Dearest Karla,

I don’t know where to start.
I guess I’ll tell you about why I got all…like this. I mean, I know this blog will dissolve into frivolous meow meow posts, but for now, background. I guess it’ll be hard to digest if you still believe that I don’t read, write, go to school or do anything but sit around in my pajamas.
I’ve always wanted to be a writer, but I don’t have a great story. I don’t have that story that would flow so perfectly, that story that I could sneak symbolism into, it makes people cry and use my quotes, that story that would make me feel like I could be something, affect someone. I still want to live that chain-smoking, hard-drinking (to the point where booze don’t get you drunk, they just get you to normal..), almost moral-less existence, but then write about God or something. God trapped in a love story that could never work out, and also everybody dies. Nobody gets anywhere. Ah, I love it.
I want to live in a time when I could have communicated with like minds. Maybe we have a cause, or maybe we are so causeless that we get to sit around and drink and smoke and write. People look up to us; maybe buy t-shirts influenced by our work. They’re like me, those people buying those shirts. They want to be something. They copy down our quotes. They buy a pair of black sunglasses and move to some big city.
I’ll buy some sunglasses. I’ll move to some city. Why is this my idea of how to make it as a writer?
So I’m studying the mind. I’m studying religion. I’m studying something to turn it on. Something that can inspire me and help me realize what I see, what I want to see.
It’s just that some words are so beautiful.
But really, I won’t go anywhere. I won’t do anything. If I had anyone to communicate with, these so-called “like minds,” I probably wouldn’t be sharing my opinions with them anyway. That’s my shtick. I don’t have opinions. There’s nothing happening now that I can bring myself to care about, anyway.
I do, though. Care. I care about some things so much sometimes.
I want to be a part of a scene, but none of them are right for me.
So that’s what I mean. I want to be a writer.

and I'm trying to leave you this comment, but the word verification isn't working for me, so I'll leave it here...
in regards to your post...

Tangent - some kid in my Medieval Philosophy class mentioned the Land Before Time in class. It was supposed to be a joke. The professor was discussing how time could exist before time was created by God or whatever. I might have cried, if I hadn't felt so much like committing violent mass homicide.
but I saw AirBud when it came out. Saw it in theaters with my mom. I remember the theater, and it doesn't exist any more.
Anyway, you know where I stand of the ultimate battle of good v. evil, right v. wrong, cat v. dog. I'm done with dog movies.


-Mantha Ray

p.s...I just realized I think I always liked blogspot better.